apologies

Al Fatihah

on 26 August 2011, also 26 Ramadhan 1432H, Friday morning - my Nek Aki peacefully passed away slightly before Subuh adhan. its been two weeks now since he left us - a wife, 6 children, 5 children-in-laws, and 18 grandchildren. and i am already missing him like crazy. and when i recalled you once said, Fatin Amira is a special name, i cried hard. i cried then, and i cry now. Allah SWT surely planned it all. He chose towards the end of Ramadhan, where almost all of his grandchildren were already back in Kuching (except for two) to have Izrail took his roh from his body. i pray he is in a better state wherever his roh might be right now. and i pray i see him again one day in The Jannah. Rasulullah SAW said people in The Jannah are all young and fit, i hope i recognise you enough, Nek Aki, coz from the photos of a younger you i saw in your house, you were quite good looking that i almost fell for you :') may Allah SWT grants us all the ability to strive for His pleasure in this world, and grants us death with Iman, Ameen. till then, my doa are always with you, Nek Aki. i ♥ you..

imy

feast for the soul

watch the rest of this heart-warming documentary :)

Part 2

Nabiollah gets the attention of the judges.

Part 3

Rifdha scores the highest point so far.

Part 4

Djamil cant talk to his mom back in Senegal, and he faces a hard time during his turn.

Part 5

announcement of the winners. Nabiollah recites for the President.

Part 6

credits.

i cant get enough of the footage. i pray one day my children will be able to memorize the Quran as well. i want to do it too, of course. InsyaAllah :)

Subhanallah :)

one or another

Assalamualaikum wbt :)

i was once asked by a male friend, ''when are you getting married?'' and i said, ''when i'm ready'' and he asked again, ''ready for what?'' i went, ''ready to take care of my husband'' and he said back, ''why do you think you have to take care of him? why is it not him who's taking care of you?'' i stared blankly at him with eyes wide open. i was taken aback. i never really give that a thought. seriously, that coming from a guy, was really a mind boggling.

i'm not the best person to talk bout relationship. i've been in one relationship with this dude since year 2000, which makes us .. 11 years plus plus now? well, i seriously stop counting after year tenth. though it is a whole ten years of a love story, i cant say that i know everything bout being in a relationship, let alone bout this species they say hails from Mars. yes, of course i learn alot from the years of being in love with one person. i know how he acts around elder people and how he treats his parents with honour, respect and passion. i know the exact word to say to tick him off. i remembered him saying how happy he was that SPM is over, that he wanted to kick me. not all that romantic, i know. its just him expressing his feelings in the weirdest choice of words. but no worries, he did NOT kick me. i watched him took those nervous proud steps on his graduation day 2 years ago. i watched him grow from a boy to a man :) what i'm saying is, being in this single relationship for this long of a period, is different from being in a few different relationships with different people. i could not compare him to another man, coz i dont know any other man. i could not feel different type of treatment, coz he's just being his oneself. i dont get to be introduced to different sets of friends, or even families. but what i could do is, i can anytime and anywhere say ''Dear! you remember that one afternoon we went to the beach and you adopted some siput to become your pets? who goes to the beach in the afternoon, seriously? anyway, you were really taking care of them by not letting them out of your sight .. eventhough they were only digging into sands to protect themselves from a creepy foster dad like you. and then after you finished your Baywatch moment we ate homemade bihun goreng together on the deck. you remember that baby? now what year was that again??'' or .... ''what was your birthday present to me when i turned 21? what did i get you? did i already give you a watch? oh crap i'm out of things to give for your birthday!'' i'm just trying to say that i can reminisce all the sweet and not too sweet moments we went through together anytime without him saying ''i never did that with you?!! // *weird stare at you* // who the heck are you thinking of right now???! // *awkward silence* // *knowing gesture* // *sulking on 1 party, or both*''

i am actually trying to say all relationships need give and take. (errr i dont think i get that message across quite correctly) like what my Justin Baby Bieber says in one of his songs 'it supposed to be some give and take, i know' a relationship doesnt work if there is only 1 part playing Romeo, nor wont it work if only 1 pair of legs doing the tango. doesnt really matter if you're in a 10-year love affair or 3 months cupid stricken, but it does matter how you treat each other with respect and much love through out every triumph and trouble. everyone needs a shoulder to cry on every now and then. behind a man's success, always stands a woman whom he cant do it without; and behind a woman's success, syurga tetap di bawah tapak kaki suami. eh?

so bottom line, do you want to be with your loved one coz you want to be taken care of, or do you want to be together so you can take care of each other for as long as Allah wills you? :)

for a short tazkirah in Ramadhan, Nabi Sulaiman AS once said to his son ''it is better to walk behind a tiger and big snakes which are black, rather than walking behind a woman''. women is the least failed weapon used by the shaitan to destruct men and make them go astray. so, in the holy month of Ramadhan, it might be a good start for all of us to learn to lower our gaze unto the opposite sex. quoting a friend: ''the more sacrifice a person makes (in controlling the gaze) the greater will be the elevation in spirituality. Ibn Qayyum rahamatullahi alayh said that a person who dies without repenting from the sin of casting lustful gazes will be deprived of seeing Allah the Most High.''

Salam Ramadhan all :) :) :)

Nisfu Syaaban

its Nisfu Syaaban tomorrow, friends :) 16 July 2011 it is, starting from Maghrib. 'nisfu' means middle in Arabic; nisfu Syaaban means the middle of the month Syaaban. there are lots of benefits of the night of Syaaban, among others:

"A hadith said that the advantage of the month of Rejab is the same as the benefits of the Holy Quran compared to other 'qalam', the month of Sya'aban as the same as the entire 'Anbia', and the month of Ramadhan as the same as Allah over all the creatures.One of the benefits of Sya'aban is that those who fast on any day, Allah will forbid him from hellfire and they will be companions to Prophet Yusof in heaven.Another hadith, as narrated by Ibnu Habban in his authentic book, from Muaz bin Jabal ra, said that Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) spoke that "Allah will see his followers on the night of Nisfu Sya'aban and Allah will give rewards or pahala to all of the followers, except those who commit syirik (witchcraft) and adultery".As narrated by Abdullah bin Amru bin al-As, which means "Allah looks at his creatures on the night of Nisfu Sya'aban, and will grant forgiveness, except for two groups, that are those who commit suicide and those who spread fitnah"." (source)

"Hari nisfu sya’aban adalah hari dimana buku catatan amalan kita selama setahun diangkat ke langit dan diganti dengan buku catatan yang baru. Catatan pertama yang akan dicatatkan dibuku yang baru akan bermula sebaik sahaja masuk waktu maghrib, (15 Sya’aban bermula pada 14 hb sya’aban sebaik sahaja masuk maghrib)" (source)

"Dari Abu Hurairah r.a : Nabi saw bersabda : “Telah datang kepadaku Jibrail pada malam nisfu Syaaban dan dia berkata : “Ya Muhammad, pada malam ini pintu-pintu langit dan pintu-pintulah rahmat dibuka. Maka berdirilah dan kerjakan solat lalu angkatlah kedua tanganmu ke langit”. Kata saya : Hai Jibrail, apakah erti malam ini?” Dia menjawab : “Pada malam ini telah dibuka 300 pintu rahmat, maka Allah swtmengampuni orang-orang yang tidak mensyerikatkan Allah dengan sesuatupun, kecuali para ahli sihir, dukun, orang yang suka bermusuhan, peminum khamar, orang yang berbuat zina, pemakan riba, orang yang derhaka kepada kedua orang tua, orang yang suka mengadu domba dan orang yang memutuskan tali persaudaraan, maka sesungguhnya mereka itu tidak akan diampuni sehingga mereka bertaubat dan tidak mengulangi.”" (source)

here's another great read. i only hope all my readers understand Bahasa Malaysia, cause i cant really find good articles bout Nisfu Syaaban in English :)

my hungry turtles

you like my new layout? you like? you like? i just think that i had enough of dull (brown) colour for my background, so i look for a fresher and brighter shades to feast your eyes! do you feel fresher??? heh apa kah dikerepak ku? but i love the layout before tooooo, so dont be surprised if i change it back to the old layout! hehe besides, i think i messed up my turtles' home on the left hand side of the screen. you see my turtles there? no turtles?? yea sometimes they're there, sometimes they wander off onto the sands sampei ilang. heheheh i dont know how to fix the size of the box. ekekekekek okay this is just random rambling on a Thursday afternoon. now i wanna cook my fish. i've been on a fish diet for two weeks. why?? coz i'm just bored of chicken! hehehe and and and i'm watching Harry Potter later in the evening! yipppyyyyy!!! dah boleh beli Harry Potter's dvd collection...! yeayy! sapa sapa rasa mok berik birthday present in advance, sela lah! ekekekekekek

                                 now you see..                                            now you don't!

toodles!

thank God it's Kuching!

i am currently in Kuching. been here for the past eight days. before i came back from KL, i had all these keazaman to update my blog and also my FB albums. BUT up til now, i havent done anything to both (this is the first attempt and i'm going off to KL soon). i rarely check the FB and i dont really log on to the blogger! then i start tracing back the root to my laziness/procrastination: when you're away from home, you have nothing else better to do than checking your account every now and then to peek on all the cool stuff thats happening that you're missing out, BUT when you're home, you're THE happening! so you dont really need those alam maya thingy to make you feel good or fill your time, coz you have real people in real time. betol sik???? cepat padah betol! erhh bottomline: my life in KL is dull la eh? you can say so, a bit lah :|

i have a cat name Fasha here. why the name, or how? well this tabby cat has white hair on her toes which makes her look as if 'berpaca'. you know, paca kuku ya bah, nail polish kata urang puteh. so instead of calling her 'Paca', i give class to the name hence 'Fasha'. hehehe bukan sempena Fasha Sanda ok. but then, as the cat grew bigger and older, she becomes ngegeh and very manjak. she's ngegeh around human - she doesnt want human to touch her, she'll run away when you go near her; she's manjak with her mummy and all other cats around - she'll come from whichever angle and poke her head to other cats' head, depan ka blakang ka tepi ka, tang ada ngesel palak nya ke palak pusak nak sekok gik ya. she usually do this to her mum lah. but if you start playing with other cats in front of her, she'll come and poke her head at you too. and thats her being ngegeh + manjak + jealous? and oh ya, she still drinks the milk from her mummy eventhough the milk are meant for the batches below her :| and then..... something happened. Fasha gave birth to three healthy kittens last Monday. at first, she looked like she didnt know what to do with the babies. beranak pun mengarei. first time bah, oo tedah. but when me and my sister put them all together in a box, she cant leave her babies even for a while! she's in the box for almost 90% of the day. she only comes out to eat, she doesnt even drink after eating but walks straight back to her babies!! she is the most loving mother cat we ever had in this house, serious aku janji! sometimes when i purposely flag the food in front of her so she would come out to eat, she ignores the food (mostly she ignores me) and continue being a caring & loving mother instead. so sweet lah u Fasha! but you're still ngegeh, alu jadi macam Fasha Sanda sikit sikit.

fifteen minutes ago i have a few more things on my mind that i want to share, but now, it looks like i forgot the points... hihihihi talk bout short attention span. macam pusak. oh i miss Mickey.

Kuching is so damn naisss!! want to stay here longer and not wanting to go back to KL soon can? pleeeeeease~

praises and gratitude

i have so many things to be grateful in life. i just finished another presentation two hours ago. another module done for the course. two days ago, when me and my partner started with the prototype, it felt like its a never-ending process of folding and cutting and taping the bits and pieces together. but today after we were done with the prototype, the concept boards and the presentation, it feels unbelievable that we actually did it. and most importantly, we did it on time. Alhamdulillah.. yeay!

i have so many things to be grateful in life. in time of sadness, or confusion, or when the pressure of getting things done in time and at the same time giving out the best is really testing my patience, i have Him to turn to, and everything else in life seems so small compared to the reassurance that i get back. in time of loneliness and when it feels like no one else could actually be there with me and for me, i am grateful that i have my thoughts on Him and i know that He's watching on me and He's taking care of me. at times when others are panicking and running back and forth looking for answers, i got mine from praying to Him, my Creator. thank you Allah for opening my heart. thank you Allah for i am born in a Muslim family. thank you Allah for the faith i have in you. thank you Allah for i will always have you in my life. thank you Allah for everything, everything, everything that i see, touch, feel, listen, think and smell everyday.

lets spend a minute or two and raise our hands to express our gratitude and praises to Him, Allah the al-Mighty, for everything that we have today.

source

i have so many things to be grateful for in life.

we have so many things to be grateful for in life.

hey June!

helllloooo people!! it is officially a month since my last entry! it has been a very busy one month for me, with many ups and downs of mood swings, well mostly downs. if it does swing up, it only lasted for a moment and i'm back down the slope.. if i could make a graph out of my mood, it think it'll probably look like a drawing with two or three small hills with deep abyss in between. haha ok metaphor. i'm actually still in class, just finished a so-so presentation. standing and talking in front of a crowd always makes me say stuff i regret. HAHAHA lets just say it didnt go that well. ok thinking bout the presentation makes me sad...

will be having term break soon though! now that is something to look forward, right?? now lets get back to more submissions!