1, 2, 3

#1

when we are far apart, i badly wish we are close. so we can always meet up. so i can always be there by your side anytime you want me to. so i can hold you, touch you and make you feel ok just by being there. but when we are seated side by side, my tongue is tied. i have nothing in my brain that could form a word that i could speak up, but i have so much in my heart that i want to pour, doubting if you want to hear them all. and so i wish we are not that close, maybe in the same room but not on a rendeavous of four eyes. i know i suck at speaking up. i just want you to feel ok, and know you're feeling ok. but i can be a good listener though.

#2

i recalled that awkward lunch we had in town years back. that one afternoon. we barely know each other but we promised to meet up. it is refreshing to meet a new old friend. we dont really have a memory of each other, but we know we are friends when we are a little bit younger, a little bit cuter :) i miss hanging around with you. but is it possible for us to miss something that never really happened? or at least i cant remember if it happened. or is it not missing a friend that's inside. perhaps its more to longing to spend more time with an old friend, and get to know you better.

#3

i miss watching orchestra at Dewan Filharmonik Petronas. i want my jaw drops on my lap while my eyes make quick blinks for the first 10 minutes of the performance (the ones after the first 10 minutes are controllabe with ryhtmic heart beat and joyous blinks) never wanting to lose sight of any movement made by the team (i just love to know who makes what sound, though i know i cant watch them all at once), while i hold my breath . and how the applause ALWAYS start with one person and then join by others, just like in the movies (and we think those movies are corny). and how each piece could move me to tears which i usually hide - afraid the person who sits next to me thinks i'm a drama queen on the lose. and watch late-comers in grammy-award-dress make their unfashionably late entrance during the intervals. i miss the one we had in Kuching last two years by the Malaysian Philharmonic Youth Orchestra even more cause nothing feels better than doing what i love in my very own home town with my very own loved one :)

 my first order! yay! :D